Woody Allen is a Realistic Pervert

Woody Allen took a few minutes out from sticking his 70 year old penis into his now-35 year old wife to tell the Associated Press that their relationship is "one of the truly lucky things that happened to me in my life" and that it has a "more paternal feeling".

Apparently fatherhood feels like really young poontang. So I'm off to sire a litter of sarcastic evildoers.

Now if you'll excuse me, I'm going to the bathroom to ferociously vomit the mental images from my head into the toilet.

Source: MSNBC